i just need to let it all go.

i dont understand you at all.
and lately i havent been able to understand anything.
you could say pretty much this is one of the suckiest times of my life.
i really really hate it.
if someone asks me whats wrong i wouldnt be able to answer them.
its just many little small things combined which is affecting me so much right now.
i hate feeling this way, naturally.
i know, there's always a reason for things.
but right now i need to know the reason and just not be treated this way.
nothings been going my way.
feeling like crap and crying over shit.
and it doesnt help that i feel so all over the place cause of my mood swings.
ive been trying to keep it in and just stay calm.
dont create a fuss and more problems.
but thats just killing me inside.
its eating away at me and i hate living this way.
i know letting out my feelings might result in even more disastrous things.
but then again, if its disastrous endings, then maybe im with the wrong characters.
maybe i havent found the storybook i belong in.
i would hate to think thats the fact but it just might be true.
i know it feels comfortable to be like this and just stay this way but maybe there is better out there for me.
maybe.
fuck maybe man.
i hate this.