Sunday, February 19, 2012 @ 12:39:00 AM
Break
cause its just too comfortable to give up.
alright so jc life is taking quite some time to get adjusted to.
and i had a little taste of how difficult it is going to be.
honestly, i never felt so clueless in a lecture before.
and i actually did feel like crap.
but thank you darling.
just started dance last friday.
and had another session just hours ago.
i swear its tiring as hell but the feeling of dancing is just so exciting.
especially so after all these years.
sure i feel so out of place when im not as flexible as the rest.
but what i cant make up for in flexibility, i make up for in passion.
the need to feel so much in a dance.
its just so empowering.
and so worth it.
okay so truth be told valentines day wasnt anything really special.
of course the gift i got from him was thoughtful beyond words and hearing how he struggled to get something appropriate for me makes me appreciate it even more.
but i guess it was just like everyday.
that also made me realise he is already perfect to me every other day and not just only on valentines day.
so seriously, what more could i ask for?
i hope i get through this year good enough without just barely making the pass.
its going to be really difficult to manage.
already foresee the problem of time management.
what with studies, dance and finding time around our schedules for each other.
its not going to be easy.
but of course, its always worth the effort.
she offers the most warm smile she can conjure.
dying inside just for the need of acceptance.
to see that flicker of kindness in the other's eyes.
its there for a moment.
but just as fast as her heart beating, its gone.
and all thats left is the cold display of disgust.
the cycle repeats.
inspires
Sunday, February 5, 2012 @ 10:59:00 PM
Escape
and you cant run away from it.
so finally its orientation tomorrow.
after hearing stories about the different orientations i should say im having high expectations.
but all i really want actually is to make some really good friends and have hell lot of fun.
its all about the company.
and then of course cant believe i would be starting jc life proper soon enough.
thought life couldnt go any faster.
guess i was wrong.
yet another face from the past.
just when i thought no more could resurface.
it definitely caught me off guard.
and of course there is still suspicion.
i cant trust you enough yet.
though i know im the one who should be at the losing end i guess the im just not willing to risk anything.
and the thought that after all these years.
i dont know what to think.
the last thing i would want right now is mixed feelings.
no.
definitely not.
my mind is clear this time and i couldnt have wanted anything more.
my heart shall not betray me.
so alright the excitement is fading.
but truth be told i really dont know what i would do without you.
when i think of a life where we have gone our different ways, its then i realise again how much you mean to me and how im not willing to lose you.
its these constant reminders that keep me believing that we can be all we want to.
yet again, its the test of time.
inspires
